Need Of the Hour...

                                       Need Of the Hour...

What we fear doing most is.....

Usually what we most need to do .....

I really don't know what the need of the hour for me is... At the first moment, I am the most optimist person in this world ... Thousands of thoughts are wandering in my mind... hundreds of Aims I have to achieve in this life... tens of incomplete wishes I have to complete in this tiny life... The foremost goal is to make everyone happy no matter what they did or what they are doing ... I want to please ALLAH...

At the second moment a few minutes later, I became the Realistic one coming from the world of fantasy... I realize I can't do this and this the thousands of thoughts get changed into thousands of worries like How can I do this... if I did this what others say... what about my moral values... No, No, I can't do this It's against my parent's pride... I became more and more realistic... denying all my wishes I started thinking about the real-life .... only tens of Aims remains killing all my dreams and wishes... 

In the next few minutes, I became the pessimist... All the voices in my mind get deeper and deepest nothing remains... I got fed up with everything... Got irritated with my own voice... Don't want anyone around me... Got frustrated... 😩😔

At that time I just wanna run away from this world... I just wanna disappear like total black where no one missed me... Where I don't miss anyone... where no one knows me who am I... I get tired of making everyone happy ... feeling worthless...

But in the next moment my mood swings... don't know how ...

I think the need of the hour for me is to be opportunist... phony... But I can't hide my feelings as my face has the tale-telling quality I can't ignore I can't smile when I am upset... 

I really don't need helping hands or someone to console me... I am the only one who is able to change my mood none of the others can do... 

I just need myself away from everyone in every hour to be calm ... to be happy... I just have to realize my own importance... 😊😊