Joint Family system is a mess....

                    The joint Family system is a mess...

I often listen that a joint family system is best for the mental and emotional training of kids.

 It provides a healthy environment to live in. It provides the kid allot of relations to enjoy. It taught them how to respect others. Kids get training that how to live with their relatives and others. They are going to face a lot of issues there. But Rather than this many of us want to be live in a joint family even knowing about the issues and crises that someone would face in these systems.

To be very honest I observed a joint family system at the closest range and believe it’s nothing else than the biggest mess of your life. In joint families, you don’t have the right to live your life instead you are taught how to please your relatives. It doesn’t matter what you did or what you are going to do and what you have done just to please them. Such relatives believe that it’s their biggest and important precedence to make you feel unimportant and worthless. They think that you are their slave and you will follow everything that they said to you and also you don’t have the right to go against them just because they have the complete right on you.

They will never be happy from your side if you are sweet to them they will bless you with thousands of bestowals by giving such names like a clever, cunning, opportunist and after that, you don’t want to be sweet with others. On the other hand, if you want to be straight forward with them they will give you the title of overbold, sassy, and impudent. They think that you don’t have your self-esteem.

Rather of this...

There is a lot of crisis and quarrels between the members living in that family in our terms it is called as شریکا.  I don’t understand who are these people who make your life tough by saying when our child didn’t get this then why yours... when I don’t go there then you also don’t have to go...

Among these entire crises, the biggest and the worst contretemps is all about the property they own. Even they have a lot of things but they still said that why he had this when I don’t have.

These clashes ... these conflicts ... vitiate the equanimity of your life.

 You get so tensed in such situations that you forget how to live your own life...The worst trauma of a kid’s life is when these crises separate them from all other relations with whom he was living from the start.

I am not saying that every relative is of the same kind some of them love us unconditionally but some of them Aberrant us so badly that we even don’t want to trust others.

Such relations became the ulcer of our life that we are not able to cut them off from our lives because they mean something for us but in contrast, we are also not able to live with them because they are continuously giving us the pain by their words by their behavior and we can’t tolerate them and that is the limit of our patience when we decided to be separated.  They think that we are happy with it but we don’t coz we spend many important years of our life with them.

Many people think that a separate house is the best solution to be calm why don’t they think that the walls of their previous house were not hurting them but their relatives did. And by changing the house you don’t change your relatives.

I think it’s better to be separated from these systems in starting as it may save us from the real hardships and trials of our life by giving us the right to live our own life.

 Sometimes I think that what will happen if  I get the chance to choose my relations, family but then I think how could I???? I am still not able to judge people and when I choose someone and he’ll prove himself the worst partner for me then what will I do?? it means that I am ruining my life by my own hands then I started to trust on the creator again who choose them for me... and started again with the hope that they will not do anything again..

But seriously joint families are nothing else than the biggest mess and they prove it...